Parish of Leatherhead - Eric Fison 1920-2009
The Service ST. MARY
& ST. NICHOLAS A Service to
Celebrate
Tuesday, 1st
September 2009 |
 |
Order of Service
The Sentences
Introduction
Hymn: The day thou gavest, Lord, is ended - one of Eric’s favourites
First Reading: 1 Corinthians 13, verses 1-13, read by James
I may be able to speak the languages of human beings and even of angels, but if I have no love, my speech is no more than a noisy gong or a clanging bell.
I may have the gift of inspired preaching; I may have all knowledge and understand all secrets; I may have all the faith needed to move mountains—but if I have no love, I am nothing.
I may give away everything I have, and even give up my body to be burned—but if I have no love, this does me no good.
Love is patient and kind; it is not jealous or conceited or proud;
love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable; love does not keep a record of wrongs;
love is not happy with evil, but is happy with the truth.
Love never gives up; and its faith, hope, and patience never fail.
Love is eternal. There are inspired messages, but they are temporary; there are gifts of speaking in strange tongues, but they will cease; there is knowledge, but it will pass.
For our gifts of knowledge and of inspired messages are only partial;
but when what is perfect comes, then what is partial will disappear.
When I was a child, my speech, feelings, and thinking were all those of a child; now that I am an adult, I have no more use for childish ways.
What we see now is like a dim image in a mirror; then we shall see face-to-face. What I know now is only partial; then it will be complete—as complete as God’s knowledge of me.
Meanwhile these three remain: faith, hope, and love; and the greatest of these is love.
Tribute from the family, by John
Good morning. I would like to tell you about my father – much loved husband of Barbara and also father to James and Mary, and grandfather to Lizzie and Katie, Luke and Alastair, Oliver and Max and soon to be great grandfather to Lizzie and Isaac’s eagerly expected arrival. This is a love story – a traditional, old fashioned one with a happy ending.
Eric was a great man – a true gentleman, in every sense of the word, and we are here to celebrate his long, happy and inspirational life. Most of you know he didn’t believe in climate change, European Monetary Union, short cuts or even “modern” food - in fact anything served with rice was considered a bit racy by his standards!
Eric and Barbara in their gardenI know many here know him well but being a private and incredibly modest man, some of what I say may be of interest and also help us to understand the factors that contributed to making him such a source of strength and support to us, his family, and the many people he came into contact with.
He was born in Norwood, South London, on the 23rd of August 1920, the only son of Churchill and Eleanor Fison. Eleanor was a devoted mother and his father was a successful businessman with a civil engineering company that my father once hoped would become Fison and Son. He had a religious, and, as you would imagine, a traditional upbringing. He was an active member of the Scouts and went to Dulwich College. He enjoyed Dulwich College and it was there that he learned Latin and developed a strong understanding of grammar and English. Indeed, we found, this week, a letter he had sent to the Editor of the Times with corrections, and a reply accepting his wisdom.
As a child he spent many a happy holiday visiting relatives in Harrogate and I am sure this is where he started to develop his sweet tooth. He continued to enjoy Harrogate toffee and fudge throughout his life, and indeed confectionery from any City for that matter. This sweet tooth became one of his meal-time trademarks and he often told me that the only reason he ate a small main course was to qualify for dessert. Later, we will be serving a Devon tea as part of the celebration, in his honour!
At the age of 15, his father died, leaving my father and his mother in the midst of the Great Depression, with many challenges, not the least of which being financial. He told me how he was supported by many friends and family in this difficult time and by Dulwich College and he was very appreciative of the fact that he was able to finish his studies. This, however, meant he could not go to university, as he had a mother to support. So instead he went to work for Croydon Corporation while studying law and business at night.
This early period of his life developed his sense of responsibility - to his mother, his love of the English language, his sense of community, his Faith and formed the man we all knew and loved – the risk averse, Conservative (big and small C) gentleman that would always be willing to help and listen to others, providing wise advice whenever asked.
His sense of patriotism was deeply rooted and when England declared war in September 1939 he immediately volunteered, aged 19. He joined the Royal Air Force and was granted his wish to train as an aerial photographer – pursuing his teenage hobby. During his time studying with the RAF in Farnborough he regularly visited his mother in Upper Norwood – an 80 mile round trip that he travelled by bicycle – no doubt with only one gear! He would have a 36 or 48 hour leave window and the weekly journey interestingly took him through Leatherhead, possibly even past this very Church.
In early 1941 he was issued with his tropical kit and then in February 1941 he set sail from Scotland on the Warwick Castle, as part of a convoy, with a large naval escort, to South Africa and then to India. From there he went to Burma [with 60 Sqn], where he stayed until the Japanese invaded and then he was fortunate to be flown back to India by the RAF, as the Japanese approached. He spent some time in India, which he enjoyed, especially the cooler stay in the Himalaya foothills. He then returned to South Africa by ship for further aircrew training, returning to England around the time of D-Day for further training with Bomber Command. He was subsequently transferred to a Mosquito Squadron before returning to a role in Farnborough at the end of the war.
His war-time exploits further strengthened his deep sense of patriotism and indeed his desire to see England retain its independence. I am sure many people here today would have received letters from him with his famous ‘Save the Pound’ or ‘Buy British’ stickers affixed!
Despite his early life clearly shaping his attitude to risk, he was always open minded enough to support others, including me, in pursuing entrepreneurial ventures. I remember asking his advice when I first contemplated going it alone in business. While he would not have taken the risk himself, he advised me to go for it - as otherwise I might be left wondering what might have happened. His advice and support gave me the encouragement I needed and for that I will forever be grateful.
After the war he was demobbed in 1946 and went back to work for Croydon Corporation but missed the friendships and interests he had enjoyed with the RAF. So he enlisted with the RAF Volunteer Reserve and a small flying team based out of Redhill. He flew most weekends until the group was “put out to grass”, in his own words, with the coming of the jet age.
Then the love story began with all of his formative years having already shaped the man he was and the way he would lead his life. He met Barbara at a Holiday Fellowship stay at Lyme Regis in August 1950. They quickly realised they were a perfect match and fell in love, getting engaged in March 1951. They married on the 2nd of August 1951, at Harrow-on-the Hill Parish Church.
Wedding, 2nd August 1951, at Harrow-on-the Hill Parish ChurchHe decided to study at night to become an accountant. It was a busy time for all concerned with James also being born in 1953. His sense of duty and commitment though, meant he juggled work, study, the care of his elderly mother and time with his family. His work in local Government took the family from Croydon to Crawley and then on to Oxford, before returning to Maidstone and in 1968 to Leatherhead Council where he served as Treasurer for several happy years. In Leatherhead he was proud to work on many projects including the Leisure Centre (one of the first in the UK) that was initially fiercely opposed and only subsequently was recognised as a huge success.
He then joined the General Nursing Council where he stayed for 13 years until his “retirement” in inverted commas - in 1984. Throughout all of this time Barbara transformed houses into homes and supported him and the family in every way.
He enjoyed a long and very happy retirement – travelling to all corners of the UK, as well as Europe and Canada with Barbara. He was also involved with many other community activities. He was open minded and always had the patience to listen to other people’s views. I remember one family lunch when Lizzie, his granddaughter, announced she had decided to join a political party. We all held our breath, knowing what he wanted to hear next and were much relieved when, after what seemed like a very long pause, Lizzie announced her affiliation with the Conservatives! If she had said Labour though, despite his disappointment, he would not have forced his opinions on her, he would merely have allowed her to come around in time …
He also loved reading (and collecting!) newspapers and part of his daily routine was sharing the crossword challenge with Barbara over elevenses and any other biscuit or cake opportunity he could conjure up! He was number two gardener to “the Boss” and enjoyed tending to the hedges and lawns at home in the Mount and in so doing he helped transform it into a relaxing and beautiful place that gave them both so much ongoing satisfaction.
He was a man never to be rushed! I can honestly say in 43 years I never saw him rush anything. He taught us all patience. He used to drive us all a bit batty though at meal times as he chewed every bit of meat like we as children chewed chewing gum, but that was just the patient, unflappable, man he was.
Skiing trip 1989He was an active man and especially enjoyed walking, cycling, squash, tennis, badminton and skiing. He was a true inspiration to all of us in how he remained fit and healthy until the end. Believe it or not he was participating in a keep fit and pilates class over the last year, at the merry age of 88! Skiing though was a particular favourite and at last count he had visited 25 different ski destinations around Europe. He loved the fresh air, the mountains, the exercise and no doubt the odd bar of Swiss chocolate.
Eric with son John at Queens' in 2008I have happy memories of walking down The Mount with Mary when we were 5 or 6 to meet him as he cycled home every day from the Council Buildings. He would always make time to come home for lunch and indeed to sit and watch Trumpton with us. I also remember many happy family holidays in this country and Europe. We often played cards, although he wasn’t very good at one game we wanted to play as children – that of Cheat! As a testament to his integrity and honesty he couldn’t play this game because it would have forced him to lie about the cards in his hand.
He was an active member of the local community and supported this church, local charities and local associations – notably CIPFA, his professional Institute, the Children’s Society, Probus, the Conservatives and the Fetcham Residents Association. Whilst being a private man he gained great satisfaction from delivering notes on these worthy causes and getting to know local people, with whom he gained great friendships over the period of many years.
Sadly the local area won’t be quite as clean a place without Eric the Womble - he hated litter and took it on himself to clean up wherever he went! You couldn’t go anywhere without him filling a bag with discarded cans and sweet wrappers.
He was interested in the internet and modern computers but it was something he decided not to invest time in. He did ask me 2 years ago though to go down to the Library to learn more about it, but after we had spent 10 minutes getting the PC started and typing in www.google.com he decided it was best left to the younger generations.
He didn’t really need the internet though – his wide knowledge and great memory remained throughout his life. He would often put us all to shame for his recall of detail, current affairs and places – he amazed me just last month when he named a castle we had just visited in Switzerland without batting an eyelid, despite the fact that he had not been there for over 30 years!
He respected everyone’s opinion but some things he always did his way. He always wanted to pass away peacefully at his beloved home. This he achieved and with the benefit of having seen all of his much loved and loving family over the last few weeks and months – we were all lucky enough to have spent this quality time with him.
I said this story is a love story – it is. He was married to Barbara for 58 very happy years and loved her as much on his final day as the day they became engaged and married. Only a year or two ago on one of my regular trips back from Australia, I remember seeing the twinkle in their eyes as they greeted each other at breakfast time – their long and happy marriage is an inspiration to all of us in the family.
His consideration, care for, and love of Barbara was his only concern in the last year or two of his life and before he left, he ensured that she would be well looked after until such time as they meet again. What an amazing couple they are.
He would have wanted me to thank everyone for their kind messages to Barbara and us, his family, as he was always the first to thank anyone for any act of kindness or generosity. So a heart felt thank you to everyone here today.
To us he was a great man. As I have said … a true gentleman. His care, advice, reassurance, love and support of his family over the years opened many doors for us, and we will all be eternally grateful for having been a member of his family and a part of his life.
He leaves us with a huge legacy of attributes and values that we would all be proud to demonstrate in even a fraction of the way he did in living his life. He taught us Faith, Hope and of course, the most important thing of all – love.
From all of us – Barbara, James and Carolyn, Mary and David, Katie, Elizabeth and Isaac and Oliver and Max, Luke and Alastair, Julie and me – We love you. We thank you for everything you have done for us and we hope you are peaceful and happy and enjoying a very well deserved rest in a place that no one deserves to be in more than you.
Prayers of Remembrance
Second Reading: John 14, verses1-6, read by Mary
“Do not be worried and upset,” Jesus told them. “Believe in God and believe also in me.
There are many rooms in my Father’s house, and I am going to prepare a place for you. I would not tell you this if it were not so.
And after I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to myself, so that you will be where I am.
You know the way that leads to the place where I am going.”
Thomas said to him, “Lord, we do not know where you are going; so how can we know the way to get there?”
Jesus answered him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life; no one goes to the Father except by me.
Address by Canon David Eaton:
John has spoken touchingly of Eric and identified his two main working concerns - the Nursing Council and Leatherhead UDC - the reason he and Barbara moved to Fetcham to live locally. We extend sincere sympathies to her and her family in their loss.
Eric was also closely involved in the life of this Church and acted as Honorary Treasurer, as he did for other local charities.
I think we can see by these choices that Eric had a deep commitment to public and charitable service, including wartime service. In a day when City bonuses and celebrity culture seem to set the tone it is refreshing, and salutary, to be reminded of the importance of public service. It used to be a prominent ethic, which Eric very much fulfilled and personified. Perhaps it will again take a higher profile than it presently seems to, but meanwhile we can only be thankful for Eric and the standard and example he set.
Public service understands we are not a collection of individuals competing to the top of the heap, but a community of people interdependent and at our best when we cooperate, and put other people’s concerns above our own. Jesus calls us to serve each other as he was the servant of all.
You knew by knowing him, not only that Eric followed Our Lord’s example, being amongst us as one who serves, but also that in doing so he acted only with integrity and probity. He was entirely straightforward and genuine in all that he did.
This was matched by his consideration in his relationships and dealings with other people summed up so well on the order of service by the description “a true gentleman”. He was always courteous and generous.
Like many others I benefited from Eric and Barbara’s generosity and hospitality at their home in The Mount as through their involvement in church life. Their concern for children showed through their tireless work for the Children’s Society. Eric was a man of broad sympathies and understanding.
When it came to worship Eric liked it straightforward and traditional. His real worship home was Prayer Book Evensong. But even here his gentlemanly good manners came through. He wasn’t a protagonist against those who liked their worship in some other, probably, more modern form. He allowed others their choices and preferences. Neither was he dour or stick-in-the-mud. I always felt there was a twinkle in his eyes and a generous sense of humour not far away. And as well as all this he was likeable and fun to be with. You always enjoyed his company.
I don’t know how Eric came into the faith but it was clearly central to his life. His courtesy to others and his public and Christian service all derived from his faith in God. Eric didn’t have the right way because he felt he ought to, but because his faith inspired him and he believed that faith was real and relevant.
It is for all these things, and more, that we give thanks to God for Eric today and the life he shared among us. He has lived to a good, even great age, and been a devoted husband to Barbara as well as father and grandfather.
We visited Chartwell yesterday, Winston Churchill’s home overlooking the Weald of Kent. It’s an insight into his life in politics and his leadership in World War Two. But also his family life and creative hobbies, like painting and bricklaying, which he pursued in and out of office. Great men and women of history live at another level from the rest of us. But in other ways their lives are just like ours: family photographs on display on desk and table; treasured books and paintings; photos of Winston and Clementine enjoying the grandchildren.
All these things, together with career and working life, make up the jigsaw of our lives. At the end of life each piece is in play. Some pieces we may regret – Churchill had his failures and mistakes to live with. But when life ends the picture is in place and our lives complete. Chartwell is the jigsaw come together for Churchill. We can trace his life from beginning to end – see the whole sweep.
In a similar way we see today Eric has a great deal to his credit through his chosen career, and by virtue of the kind of person he was, and the Christian qualities and virtues he displayed.
All these are like an offering of life, which each of us makes to God. We have received life as a gift and as a gift we give it back. It is gladly received by God and valued.
We hear “well done, good and trustworthy servant” from the Gospel. We know that these virtues do not earn us a place in heaven, but they do bring their own just reward. A loving God reaches out to embrace those he receives into a heavenly home ... “I go to prepare a place for you” … and to care for and comfort those who are left behind, at a loss for a time without the one they deeply loved. The love of the Lord is patient and kind and eternal. He reaches out to us in time of need and vulnerability.
So we give thanks to God for Eric and we commit him to God’s safe keeping. A true and Christian gentleman whom we have been privileged to know and share our lives with.
May he rest in peace.
Prayers of Thanksgiving
Hymn: Fight the good fight - chosen by Barbara
Commendation
Blessing
Music: Toccata from Symphony No.5 by Charles-Marie Widor
The retiring collection was in aid of The Children’s Society
images: via Fison family
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Last updated 16th September 2009